Fuck, Now There Are Two of You, by Adam Mansbach

Nine stars

Every parent has surely wondered about expanding their family after a first child. The curiosity of seeking to add another slobbering mouth to feed and body to sleep is real. Adam Mansbach tackles this topic in a children’s book format. Through rhyming prose, Mansbach looks at the various dramatic events that occur when one child becomes two and the horrors that could ensue. As the narrator tells the elder child how their life will change with the addition of a second, the pain is real. A sort of self-reflection on the truths of a new baby, Mansbach spells it out with great detail, peppering in some profanities to bring the point home. Highly entertaining and realistic at the same time, Mansbach adds humour to keep the adult reader laughing.

While the story is compact, the impact is still felt. Mansbach uses rhyme to show how a second child can go from a nice idea to a panic-driven reality. Disaster and worry envelop the parents as the elder child must be told that things will forever change. Mansbach keeps the reader laughing until the very end, with a reflective zinger many parents have wondered themselves.

Kudos, Mr. Mansbach, finding the funny in panic and horror that follows the news of a new baby.